Mother's Day...

I want to find joy in motherhood. Joy in living life. Joy in all the little things that pass so quickly. Joy in the crayon scribbles on the table knowing I won't see those chubby little fingers grasping a crayon in a few years. Joy in a messy kitchen, knowing I've just fed my husband and children a meal. Joy in water on the bathroom floor knowing I've just bathed my little beauties and before long they'll want their privacy in a shower. Joy in hearing the word, "Mom, mom, mom, mom, mom..." twelve-hundred times a day knowing that is the sweetest word I shall ever hear.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't just a little scared for our new little baby coming. I'm a little scared about how messy my house might be, how tired I'll be, how many more handprints and muddy feet there will be, how many more Dr.'s appts. and bouts with the flu there will be. But I know I need to leave my fears in the hands of my Heavenly Father. He will help me get through all the challenges and obstacles to come my way and will help give me those moments of hugs, kisses, and tender words that I need with my beautiful, sweet children that help to get me through the day.

I am thankful for the mother's in my life and how they have shaped me into who I am. I follow their examples and try to be the best mom I can to these two little ones. Am I a gourmet chef? Hardly. But I still try to make healthy, homecooked meals when I can and love that my kids like to snack on blueberries and broccoli. Am I a seamstress who makes all my kids' clothes? Nope. But I bargain hunt and today they're wearing clothes that I got on sale at the end of last year's summer season to save a buck. Do I keep a perfectly clean house day in and day out? Let me tell you how much I'd like to. I have run myself ragged this week cleaning, organizing, scrubbing, wiping the fingerprints off the bathroom mirror several times each day, cleaning the carpets, doing laundry, and putting away toys to see if I could keep it spotless for a week. I would LOVE a perfectly clean house, but know that life goes on and this isn't as realistic as I'd like it to be. Am I careful with my words and never raise my voice? Again, wishful... I try. But sometimes, yeah, okay, I yell. I feel badly afterward and wish I didn't, but I don't understand some days why we need the sweater that goes with the shirt that goes with the pants that goes with the sandals that goes with the particular hairbow for 8am preschool?! I need more patience.

You know, I didn't want this post to be about what I'm not, because one day a year I want to feel great. I want to feel like a wonderful mom who loves her children and tries hard to take care of them. My dad told me today what a great mom I am and what a great job I'm doing. That's it. That's all I needed to hear. That's what every mom needs to hear on Mother's Day. I work hard to get the flowers from my husband, new griddle from my girls, and chocolate dipped strawberries from church, and a day to not cook or clean. And I want to enjoy it. And I did. With my family and my children. And that is a pretty spectacular Mother's Day.